Today I’m chatting with Tamsin Williamson, aka the Parenthood Coach, about how parenting is a superpower in business, and while being a parent often seems to feel at odds to running a business, they actually work very well together.
Listen to the Episode:
Ruth Poundwhite 0:00
Instead of forcing us to abandon ourselves and our dreams, what if Parenthood was the most powerful enabler? I’m talking all things running a business alongside parenting with today’s guest, the parenthood coach, Tamsin Williamson.
Ruth Poundwhite 0:16
You’re listening to quietly ambitious with conversations about how it really feels to build a business that honours your whole self unapologetically. And that includes who you are, how you feel, what you really desire, the impact that you want to create, and importantly, the money you want to make. I’m your host, Ruth Poundwhite, and my superpower is supporting sensitive and ambitious humans to make more money by fully expressing and owning all of who they are. Let’s dive in. Hi, and welcome back to another episode of The quietly ambitious Podcast. Today I am chatting with Tamsin Williamson, aka the parenthood coach about how parenting is a superpower in business. And while being a parent often seems to feel at odds to running a business, the two actually work very well together. Tamsin is a transformational life and mindset coach, trained mindfulness teacher and mom of two spirited kids. Thompson’s mission is to support ambitious, but unfulfilled mums who feel their passion, purpose and potential have been stifled by the intensity of motherhood. In this episode, we talk about how parenthood can inspire an arm us with skills for business, how it can enable our dreams rather than forcing us to abandon them. And the key mindset shifts that make it all work. Okay, so I want to start by asking you, How has your experience of motherhood inspired you as a business owner? And why do you believe that parenthood is actually a superpower for entrepreneurs?
Tamsin Williamson 1:52
So I think the first thing to say is that before I became a parent, I never ever would have considered myself as the type of person who would start a business. You know, I think I probably had those conversations with people before. And I was like, oh, no, that’s not who I am. It’s, and it’s not for me. So I think something happened through the experience of becoming a mother.
Tamsin Williamson 2:18
That shifted my beliefs around what was possible for me. Or yeah, what being an entrepreneur meant, perhaps. But I think my experience of being a parent being a working parent, it had such a profound impact on my sense of self around what my priorities were, things shifted so much. And I think the impact that that had on my happiness, and what was, you know what fulfilment looked like, for me, it was so significant, that actually, I was able to kind of open myself up to this possibility of being a business owner, we shouldn’t be by surprise, as much as it might have taken other people by surprise, as well. And it was scary, the thought of kind of shifting my sense of self into that space. But actually, the more I allowed myself to play with it, and to consider what life could look like, running a business alongside being a parent, the more I started to kind of realise that actually, it probably would suit me really well. And it did. But like, you know, being real about it, you know, being a parent is a bit of a roller coaster ride, I think most parents will agree that, you know, it’s full of ups and downs. It’s a very emotional experience. Of course, so much wonderful stuff in there as well. But yeah, it’s a bit of a roller coaster ride. And I think the same can be said, for running a business as well. You know, it’s definitely not the easy choice. So I do understand why a lot of people might feel that actually, it’s not a viable option, or it’s just going to make an already intense situation even more intense. But I have really, really personally found that, yes, there are ups and downs. As a business owner, there are ups and downs as a parent, but actually following those two paths side by side, they have somehow made both paths make a bit more sense for me, somehow. I feel that they really enhance each other, they complement each other really well. And definitely, I think this is where I suppose the shift might take place since having become a parent, but I think definitely becoming a mum has armed me with so many skills and experiences and new perspective. I think have really, really helped me on my entrepreneurial path. both practical and emotional skills, I suppose that I’ve picked up, I think there are two, two layers to it. And I think on the flip side, it’s also helped me show up being a business owner has actually helped me show up as a better mum as well, in a lot of ways, I think it’s made a massive difference to how I’ve embraced motherhood, so sort of feels like a bit of a win win situation.
Ruth Poundwhite 5:31
Yeah, I like what you said about how you never would have considered yourself to be the kind of person who started a business, and then that changed when you became a mother. Because I think that’s the thing when you have children, like so much that your sense of self does, like, totally get shifted, whether it’s permanently or just temporarily, but there’s a lot of stuff going on. And it’s can be a bit of a whirlwind, trying to make sense of it all. But that is like, the beautiful thing about it. Like seeing new possibilities or having an experience, then that encourages you to think of a different way of doing life, I suppose now that you’ve got this other human or humans to do life with, be there?
Tamsin Williamson 6:15
Yeah, definitely. And I think, you know, everybody’s experience of, I’m gonna say motherhood, because I’m a mother, but the parenthood is, it is unique and different. And there is so much noise out there that can pull so many of us down just in our pure experience of raising kids, you know, around how we should do it, or what other people are doing, or what our parents did, you know, there’s a huge amount of societal conditioning, that can make us feel that actually our way of raising our kids is right or wrong. And we can judge ourselves really heavily. And actually, that’s a massive parallel that I’ve noticed in my business journey, as well, the fact that actually, you know, I choose to raise my children in a way that makes sense for them as little humans, that makes sense for me as their mom, that makes sense for us as a family and actually within a business context as well. Yeah, I’m sort of really trying to apply that those same principles as much as I can, you know, try not to run my business the way I, someone told me I should, or the way that other people are, you know, really trying to be intuitive in these two really, really important parts of my life. And actually, it makes me feel so much more aligned, knowing that I’m taking that same approach in my personal and my professional life.
Ruth Poundwhite 7:43
Yeah, you know, what’s interesting, so you started your business after becoming a parent, I had a business before becoming a parent, it was shocking to me that feeling of comparison, and when I became a parent, like, being bombarded with all these different things, and like, it just felt it was it was it was a lot like surprising given that I had been doing my own thing, my business for so long. But I think that my growth, after having my son has gotten side by side, like learning to do it my way, as a parent learning to it more of my way, as a business owner, like I’d already been doing it. But yeah, it totally accelerated the driving. That’s what I’m trying to say like, massively.
Tamsin Williamson 8:25
Infinitely and, and I think they’re both really emotional experiences as well, you know, and I know that you, you speak very directly to, to highly sensitive people to emotional humans, and actually, the emotional experience of being a parent and all the different layers of emotion connected to that, alongside that emotional experience of running a business. I mean, it’s surprised me just how emotional I have found the experience. But again, you know, somehow, those experiences, I think, they come together to help you grow in that sense of self awareness to learn, you know, there’s so many of those different ways of processing and managing emotions that can actually be applied to both parts of our lives.
Ruth Poundwhite 9:12
For sure, and it just made me think, actually, how, because obviously, I’m a business coach, and I talk a lot about like, being supported in business and like, it brings up all the feelings and we deserve to be supported and all of this. And it just made me think about you as a parenthood coach, and how we absolutely deserve the the support through that as well. And yeah, I mean, if you want to share a bit about why you are so passionate about giving that support to people, I think that that would, it would it’s really important to talk about because it’s so much easier to like, look at sometimes look at like okay, business gets put in my business, I’m gonna get return on investment in my business, and it kind of makes sense, but it really matters in other areas of life and especially parenting as well. So yeah, I’d love to hear what you have. So about that.
Tamsin Williamson 10:01
Yeah, I think I think the thing that has drawn me to, to do this kind of work, and I suppose to be clear, I am not a parenting coach, like, the work that I do is not about supporting parents to that how to raise their kids to, you know, Sleep Train and temper tantrums, like I’m navigating all that stuff myself. But it is about their experience of life, as a parent, it is making sure that they get to do life in a way that feels aligned, that feels fulfilling, that feels meaningful to them in their own right, while honouring their role as a parent as well, while maintaining their integrity as a parent, because I think when we become parents, we, you know, so much attention goes on to our kids, right? We, you know, suddenly it’s all about their needs, and, and, and their lives and, you know, sort of channelling so much energy into ensuring that they are okay. And it’s so common, as definitely as I’m going to talk because a mother, but we can kind of lose our grasp on ourselves, and what matters to us. And the kind of you know, the priority, the pecking order changes suddenly, very dramatically. So the work that I do is about sort of shining that spotlight, not away from our kids, it’s not saying forget about the kids and just think about yourself, but it’s just making sure that there is space, to turn that spotlight on to yourself to make sure that you feature that you don’t forget yourself that you don’t abandon your own aspirations and dreams and passions and the things that matter to you. And recognising that you can have an experience of parenthood where you can feel great about how you’re raising your kids, but where you also feel great about who you are, and the life that you’re living yourself. So that is ultimately the kind of the premise of the work that I do.
Ruth Poundwhite 12:09
Yeah, I love it. So let’s talk about this idea of like, because it is a roller coaster, and it is tiring being a parent. And it is a lot to adjust to at first, well, potentially always because the kids are always growing and changing, right. But let’s talk about this idea that parenthood is not a reason to let go of our dreams, it actually gets to it gets to be an enabler. This is something you shared with me before we like we were talking about what we might talk about today. So it actually gets to be an enabler. And I loved what you said. So I would love to hear your thoughts about that. Yeah.
Tamsin Williamson 12:50
I think like it breaks my heart a bit, when I speak to women who feel that they need to almost apologise for being a parent to other people, whether it’s to friends, whether it’s to their employer, I mean, a real common challenge that I work with people with all the time on all the time is, you know, people who almost feel like they have to pretend that they’re not a parent. So they can keep up appearances so that people think about them in the way that they may be used to be before kids. And actually, there is a huge amount of value to what we can bring to the table as parents, you know, all of these exactly what I talked about the beginning all of these kinds of skills and experiences that actually being a parent arms us with, that are so very valuable to other people. So very valuable to ourselves, and how they allow us to show up into the world show up in the world. And what feels really important to me is that we are able to really appreciate and celebrate those amazing positive things that we can full pull from being a parent, that this isn’t something that we have to kind of feel we have to hide in the shadows that we have to expect less for ourselves or say, oh, you know what, this would have been okay if I hadn’t had kids, but I did. So I’m now going to, you know, not essentially not fulfil my own potential, but actually recognise that it is a massive privilege and learning journey and there is so much to gain from raising kids, and that we get to use those within our kind of toolkit to arm us to then go out there and do some of these other things that we want for ourselves. It doesn’t need to be a reason to kind of block our progress in life, but actually, it’s just something really inspiring and empowering that we can add to our toolkit
Tamsin Williamson 15:00
And yeah, I suppose there’s, you know, there’s bits and pieces, like I said, there’s sort of practical and emotional things. I mean, on a really basic level, like, I am definitely, much better at like managing my time and multitasking and prioritising things since becoming a parent, you know, and that’s on a really kind of practical level,
Tamsin Williamson 15:22
you know, I have less time my time is in, it’s in demand so much more than it used to be. So as a result, I’m having to be so much stricter with how I spend my time and the boundaries that I put in place to protect that time. All of that I feel is under so much more scrutiny, because I’m a parent. And then I suppose on a more emotional level, certainly, I think becoming a parent has really heightened my sense of purpose. In life, you know, it definitely has a really big impact on how I show up in my business, and in my family life, and, you know, it continues to have an impact on how I show up on a day to day basis. It makes running my business, it carries a bit more weight. Because a because of what it means to me, like this is my thing, my business, you know, it isn’t just about me, raising my kids, this is something that I’m doing for me. So it really, really has to matter. But it’s also about it feels important about what I’m modelling for my children and the example that I’m setting and what they believe is possible for themselves in the future as well. That’s had a that’s had a big impact on. Yeah, the meaning behind running my business for sure.
Ruth Poundwhite 16:49
Yeah, I feel the same. And it’s interesting, because I had my business before having my son, I had this feeling like, oh, maybe I won’t care about my business. Or maybe, like after I have opened, it was like, it was kind of the opposite. I mean, I did end up quitting that business and starting a new business, but it was because of it was because of how I felt after having him and being more connected to the bigger picture. So it was really interesting. And like, it’s not just about creating a great life for yourself and your family and, and creating freedom, which, by the way, is a very valid thing to one. But it’s also for me about like, well, what’s the world that we’re living in? And what was the world that he’s growing up in? And? And what’s my role in that world? And, yeah, and how can I modelled to him that I’m going to fully play my role in the world, so that he can see what that means and figure out whatever that is gonna look totally different for him. And that’s fine, but you’re seeing me doing it, they just yeah, it became so much it was like, there was so much more weight to it all for me in the most. It really empowered me even though it was scary as well.
Tamsin Williamson 17:54
Yeah, definitely. And I don’t think I realised that until I got a bit into my business journey. I think at the beginning, it really was the freedom and the flexibility. And it was the doing something that I felt fulfilled by I think those were my biggest drivers that created the shift from being employed to self employed. But the longer the further I suppose along my business journey I’ve gone, the more I have realised, like, the layers forming around what it means to me, you know, I, I think I’ve, you know, I’ve sort of said to somebody before, I was like, my business is almost like, my third baby, you know, and, and I do feel these very emotional, I feel a very strong emotional connection to my business, I feel that I am almost like, raising my business a bit. Like, I raise my kids, you know, it matters to me so much more than I ever really imagined. And sometimes, you know, that means that the difficult bits hurt more than you ever imagined that they would hurt, you know, I mean, you know, I’ve worked with you before, you know, I work with you, and you, you know, what I experience sometimes and, and on the one hand, that’s really difficult. But on the other hand, I’m like, this is just because it matters so very much to me. And actually, that feels like a massive privilege to be able to do that to be able to show my kids that I am like doing work that really, really matters to me. And then I get to, you know, not work and go and be with them, which also really, really matters to me. So it’s sort of, you know, it felt I feel very lucky to have made this choice for myself, unknowingly, but actually knowing that what it does is it also makes me a much happier and more fulfilled person. Most of
Ruth Poundwhite 19:51
Yeah, sure. And I always say like my business has been my vehicle for like, figuring out myself and certainly it doesn’t have to happen via bus And then maybe the trigger could have, I mean, the Parenthood has been pretty big trigger as well. But I take so much of what I learned in my business and all this mindset work that we do and stuff, and I apply it so much choice coming up with my son and me and my son, and how we relate to each other and all of this stuff. So, so much of it. And it’s like, yeah, it’s hard. Parenting is really hard to, and it’s worth it.
Tamsin Williamson 20:26
Yeah, I think what you just said then about sort of the impact that of what you’ve learned on your business journey, it comes into your parenting as well, I really feel like that very strongly. And particularly with my daughter, she’s, you know, she is a sensitive, and you know, she’s really, she’s really, she’s a sensitive little girl. And she’s very tuned into, like, her emotions. And she’s happy to talk about that. And I’ve really found that it’s been a great connection point between us, you know, to help her feel more understood, and I feel much better equipped, through the conversations that whether it’s conversations that I’ve had about my own, on my own business journey, whether it’s conversations that I have with my clients, I feel so much better equipped now to support my kids, through their own emotional with their own emotional needs. As a result of it as well. Yeah, I love that.
Ruth Poundwhite 21:15
So if there was someone like listening, who was thinking, Yeah, it sounds great, but how do I actually make it work? Like, am I going to make this leap to run my own business alongside what is already a very full life schedule? Maybe sleep deprived? What would you say to someone thinking about it? And wondering how it might work?
Tamsin Williamson 21:42
I would say that it’s not something to die, I would say honestly, it’s not something to dive into without thinking about because as I said, at the beginning of our conversation, you know, running a business is not the easy option. But I think, if you are, you know, to really think through the decision around what it is that you want to do, around the kind of the foundations of what it is that you want to get out of this experience, you know, what kind of businesses do you want to run? What kind of people do you want to work with, you know, and it could look like it can look all sorts of different ways. But I think, feeling that sense of excitement and passion for what you do, if you’ve got that, behind you, I think it’s such a good place to start. So not necessarily starting a business on a whim, but doing it because you really, really want to do the thing. I think that is the first place that I would always encourage somebody to start because the meaning behind what you’re trying to achieve when running a business. It’s got to be there to drive you forward to make it feel worth it. You know, because there will be inevitable highs and lows, there will be potentially sacrifices that need to be made. And, and to know that despite all of that stuff, you really strongly believe in what you’re doing. That’s the bit that can be your kind of consistent thread to carry you through or to make to make you just keep on taking that next step forward.
Ruth Poundwhite 23:26
Yes, I’ve really, really agree. And I do think about sometimes these people who just start businesses with seemingly not needing to have a reason, but I’m sure that there is always a reason because it’s, it is hard. And that’s what keeps you going when it when it’s hard, the the meaning behind it and and like I was saying, and you were saying like modelling to our kids that we are doing the thing that is in our heart, I think is really important.
Tamsin Williamson 23:51
Yeah. And I think the amazing thing is that, if you don’t know the answer to that, and if you feel stuck, and you’re like I know, you know, I feel I have an entrepreneurial spirit, I want to do something, but I don’t know what it is, or, you know if that feels, if you feel stuck or confused around that. But the amazing thing is, is that there are people out there who can there is support that you can lean into to help you figure that stuff out. Like I think that entrepreneurial spark, it’s something that it grows and it grows and it it’s almost a bit addictive. In some ways, do you I mean, I sort of feel like it can just be so invigorating and inspiring and empowering as you build that knowledge and the clarity grows. But sometimes it can be really lonely doing it on your own. Sometimes it can be really overwhelming and you can sort of find yourself in that paralysis state where you just kind of can’t move forward. But if you’ve got the nudge and if you feel that actually it really might be a good solution for you might spark something in you. It might really allow you to sort of bring all of these pieces of your life puzzle together and for it to just fit really nicely together, then, yeah, I would say really be curious, explore it. If there’s support out there that can help you figure stuff out, lean into that support, because sometimes figuring it out on your own is just a really hard job. And that’s not a it’s not a weakness on anybody’s side. It’s actually just, it’s just part of the process.
Ruth Poundwhite 25:27
Definitely part of the process, a lot of figuring out and you’re gonna do stuff that potentially isn’t what you ultimately want to do. But you got to do it as part of the journey. And you work with people with this, right? You parenthood coach, and also you help people starting their businesses or getting running their businesses alongside parenting as well.
Tamsin Williamson 25:47
So just Yeah, I do I do. Yeah, I’ve got a programme called the ripple effect, which does exactly that. It allows people to run a business they love in harmony with parenthood, and get that strike that balance so they can have the best of both worlds.
Ruth Poundwhite 26:01
Let’s talk a bit more about that actually, like, how do we do it all in harmony? Because balance that word Yeah, definitely takes on a whole new meaning. When you become a parent and a business owner?
Tamsin Williamson 26:16
Yeah, totally. And, and I’ll be completely honest, like, I don’t think there is a silver bullet to, to that. I, you know, and I say that as somebody who supports people to find balance in their lives, alongside parenthood, you know, but it’s there’s no foolproof plan. There’s no rulebook for how to do it. And I sort of imagine it almost as a bit of a like, ever evolving organism that’s constantly like changing and evolving, and you have to fine tune it and, and tweak it. But the important thing, I think, is to be well, first of all, to get really clear on what it is that you want, for yourself, and to experiment a bit and to see, you know, the areas where you might feel that the balance is really out, well, what might, the small thing be that you might just be able to try out to make that feel a little bit easier, what might you be able to let go of, to create a bit more space for something else. So this sort of constant trial and error approach, but always keeping what it is that you really want for yourself at the heart. And sometimes the focus might change as well, you know, I think, certainly a big area among mothers is this peace around self care. And in our own well being. And so often, it’s the thing that, you know, we’re almost too busy to make time for that. But actually creating that space, looking after ourselves, preserving our energy, tuning into our needs, whatever that is, and it will look different for all of us just making those little windows of time to honour ourselves to ask ourselves what it is that we need, it can make the biggest difference just to kind of calm, the overwhelm calm that nervous energy and make us feel so much more equipped to manage that juggle. So, you know, often that is one of the first places that I start work with clients of mine, it’s just trying to establish like, where is this space for you to come back to you. And it’s amazing how often that time does not exist at the beginning, that time for themselves just doesn’t feature. But it is such an essential ingredient, even 10 minutes a day. I’m a big, big believer in how important that is. So yeah, and, you know, there’s all sorts of other things that will that can be done to, to establish that balance. But yeah, coming back to you, and what you need is is definitely my number one tip around striking that balance.
Ruth Poundwhite 29:12
I totally agree. I mean, it’s, it’s so the same and in the business as well. Just as simple as it sounds, the amount of time we think we have time for that, or it will get in the way if we have to think about how what do I need, you know, and honestly, it’s, it’s so simple, but not easy sometimes.
Tamsin Williamson 29:36
Yeah, and actually, I think since becoming a business owner in a way I think it has become easier for me to make that time for myself, you know it, it sort of forms part and parcel of this sort of idea of being the captain of my own ship and in charge of my own time. And actually what I now do is you know I’m very intentional about blocking out these regular wear Windows have time to do stuff for myself, you know, and sometimes it’s a, it’s more involved like going to a yoga class, sometimes it is literally just making sure that I have time to have a proper lunch break or read a chapter of my book or you know, whatever it is, go for a walk around the block. But it’s knowing that actually, in the time that I do have available, that space for me needs to feature. Yeah, and I feel much more in control of being able to take that time since running my own business, as opposed to having somebody else dictating my time.
Ruth Poundwhite 30:39
So thinking about this whole trial and error thing, just like keeping it real, what are some of the lessons that you’ve had to learn the hard way, when it comes to running your business alongside?
Tamsin Williamson 30:56
that sleep deprivation is really inconvenient. As a business owner. I think it’s fair to say that, you know, sleep deprivation amongst parents, particularly those of us with younger kids, it’s so very real. And it can have a massive effect on our energy levels, on our motivation, our mood, it can, in fact, impact our self esteem, you know, when we’re tired, I think it can, like really distort our perception of ourselves. So, that is definitely something that I have found along the way, it has been a stumbling block and the things that I’ve really wanted to do or intended to do, sometimes I’ve just had to accept that they’re not going to happen in the way
Ruth Poundwhite 31:48
that I expected.
Tamsin Williamson 31:52
And I’ve had to show myself a bit of grace around that, which, on the flip side, I have the freedom to do that, you know, sometimes I’m just worried about being an unkind boss to yourself sometimes. Which can be the hardest thing again, but But yeah, I think sleep is a real can be getting enough sleep can be really, really challenging. So the better the more kind of positive sleep habits that can be incorporated within, obviously, our control. I think that can make a massive, massive difference. I also think, another, I suppose it’s on the flip side of this piece around balance. I think as a business owner, we can almost want to we can feel this need to say yes to everything. You know, there’s that sort of feast and famine cycle that so many business owners go through. And I think as a result, it can leave us wanting to say yes, or over commit to things. And to be kind of always on almost which I think as a as a parent as well, it can be very distracting, it can take our presence away, it can mean that we find it really hard to kind of create those boundaries between running a business and parenting our kids and between all kind of work and family life. And that is definitely something that I have been on a real journey with, you know, when I left my permanent employment, I was desperate not you know, to be able to sit at bath time and not have my phone there and not be distracted by colleagues emailing me or calling me asking about things. And it was such a thing that I wanted to get away from, but actually running a business because it mattered so much. Because everything was on social media and likes popping up or meth, DMS or whatever it was, actually, it was sort of equally distracting. So again, like trying to establish some of those boundaries and honouring your own boundaries, you know, this is actually set, there’s so much self discipline that is needed in there, but allowing you to really show up for your kids and not let the business sort of steal some of that time away. Because that’s when you can sort of maybe start being a bit feeling bit resentful, or feeling it’s not worth it or that it’s burning you out.
Ruth Poundwhite 34:22
Yeah, absolutely. And one of the questions you posed to me in the when we were discussing what to talk about was like, How do I feel motherhood has changed or shaped me as a business owner, and that is a big part of it is self discipline. It’s like, Oh, my goodness, I used to run my business like, so flexibility before I had my son, and it sounds really nice and stuff, but actually, I don’t think it was really serving me. You know, because it would just bleed into all kinds of times of day and it could really take over and it’s been a blessing and a curse to have to do have to be really strict with myself, like, I don’t like it when I have to go to bed at 9pm. Like, I will hold my hands and say, I really don’t like going to bed at 9pm. But sometimes I just really have to like the sleep thing that you said is the biggest, biggest thing for me. So I will go periods of time where I just have to go to bed at 9pm. And I will have to make that my priority. Like I said, I don’t like it. Because I guess you know, I just want to be doing other things. But I do like being well rested. And yeah, it’s I do think it, it has been good for me to learn more, I think I’ve been forced to connect more with my body. Because of how exhausted I get sometimes. And do you think that’s a good thing? Even if it’s sometimes feels restrictive? I think that’s the thing. Sometimes it does feel restrictive. And it is, you know, there’s a lot of routines and a lot of repetition involved, are you doing things for young kids. But the restriction and the routines are actually very helpful in a lot of ways as well.
Tamsin Williamson 36:04
Definitely. And I suppose on the flip side to that, then there’s the curveballs, right, she has the totally chaotic, unpredictable nature of having kids, the random illness of the, you know, the inset days that at school was kind of jump up and bite you in the bum, when you just didn’t realise and, you know, needing to plan or reach out reshuffle commitments around your kids needs. And I think a bit of me is still stuck in my sort of corporate mentality when it comes to this kind of thing. Like I, a bit of me sort of thinks sometimes No, you run your own business. And if your child is sick at home, then it’s fine. You let, let it go, and you’ll be there for your kid. But actually, I found sort of needing to sacrifice stuff in my business. Sometimes when the curveballs strike, actually, those are some of those moments where I’m really tested, where I really have to kind of dig deep to remember that actually, I am so lucky to be in this position where I run a business, I’m in charge of my time, I can, you know, it might mean having to reschedule a session with a client or something like that. But actually, I also have to remind myself that I work with parents, I work with parents who really will probably understand and that, you know, having clients who I hope, you know, will feel the same compassion that I would feel for them in the same situation, you know, that sort of a little added bonus, I suppose to all of this. But yeah, managing those curveballs that kids throw at you, as opposed to just the curveballs that happened in your own right in life. That’s definitely that’s definitely something that parenthood makes a little bit more challenging in the mix. I think when running a business,
Ruth Poundwhite 37:59
I mean, even literally, this week, we had a bank holiday that we didn’t expect to have, and it totally threw off my plans. And a lot of people like yeah, I don’t know what kind of Yeah, obviously, the Queen’s funeral, but it’s like, no, that’s sort of all my plans, you know, no child care. But I mean, that’s just a minor careful, really, in the grand scheme of things. But yeah, and I find that I’ve, I have to say no to stuff I genuinely want to do, but it’s not that. It’s not that I’m saying no to it, it’s that I’m just not prioritising it right
Tamsin Williamson 38:31
now. Yeah, exactly. Yeah,
Ruth Poundwhite 38:35
exactly. Okay, so I just want to ask you to just another question. Before we wrap things up. I would love to know, what are your key mindset shifts, or the mindset shifts that you would like to offer people around parenting, around being an entrepreneur, whether they already have their own business? Or whether they’re thinking of having our business? What are some of the key mindset shifts, that you feel like would be helpful?
Tamsin Williamson 39:08
So one thing that I come back to, quite often, that sort of connects to being a parent and, and also connects to being a business owner, is the question, what’s the worst that could happen? And I’m a real, whatever. You know, I have a lot of, you know, fears and worries and what ifs around particularly in my business. And this is a question that I come back to time and time again, you know, what is the worst? What really is the worst that could happen if you do this thing or that thing? And it’s become a really powerful mantra to keep my mind monkeys in check, particularly on those those difficult days. And I think a big part of that is because as being a parent has given me quite a different perspective on some of those answers, actually, you know, the worst that could happen. You know, as soon as I bring my children into the mix, for example, in some of these situations, suddenly I’m like, oh, gosh, like, the answer feels so much clearer, or I really feel like I can handle this situation so much more. So I found that something really grounding to come back to time and time again. And another, another big sort of mindset shift. For me, that is something that actually I’ve learned a lot through the work that I’ve done with you is around treating everything as an experiment. And again, I would apply that both to parenting, and I would apply that to my business as well. Really going into things being curious, going into things prepared for it not always to work out. Knowing that it’s okay, if things go wrong, or don’t go as I expected, and knowing that I can kind of pick myself up and try something new next time or learn from it. And knowing that nothing is the final way of doing stuff. And it is a real, it’s been, it’s been a game changer for me really to think about this, because it’s allowed me to, well, let’s be real, I’m, I don’t take everything so lightly. But it’s allowed me to really be open to to being much lighter in the way in which I approach things, or at least move through the difficult moments. And it’s something and it’s actually a lesson that I feel like I’m really able to pass on to my kids as well, you know, my daughter definitely is a little I can see she’s a little perfectionist in the making. And I found myself really trying to impart this sort of mindset shift on to her as well, sort of trying to give her the freedom to like, you know, mess things up, and it’s okay, or try again and other way or just do it imperfectly, and sort of be a bit more playful with things. So it’s really nice to feel that actually, again, it’s sort of bringing it back to the synergies between being a parent and being a business owner, there is so much overlap in terms of Yeah, the way in which we can approach both of these really important things. And giving ourselves the freedom to sort of to do it imperfectly. Yeah. And to have fun with it.
Ruth Poundwhite 42:52
Yeah. Thank you. I love it. Such an important lesson for our kids as well. I agree. Okay, so the final question, just my random deck of questions. The question that came in is, what do you regret not doing when you were younger?
Tamsin Williamson 43:11
So when, what my big passion when I was younger, was modern languages. And I studied French and Spanish at university. And I lived in both countries. And when we talk about sort of doing the things that light us up, speaking, a foreign language like it still does, it gives me the biggest thrills. And I loved it, I did, you know, my degree, I did it absolutely for the joy and love of it, rather than because it was taking me in a particular vocation or direction. But then I left university and I basically found it really hard to think of what to do with those languages. And so I left them behind. The reality is, is that I didn’t really leave them behind, because I’ll always have them. They’re definitely a lot more rusty than they used to be. But I do believe that they’re kind of buried deeply inside me. And I feel very lucky and happy that I managed to find something else in my life, in addition to my languages, that sort of lights my fire. So that feels like, you know, a really positive thing. But I was just in Paris this weekend, actually, with some friends. And I got the feeling again, the joy of speaking French, but I was, there was a bit of me that sort of felt that little pang of like, oh, it’s such a shame that I never, that I never sort of committed to it that I never, you know, that I never allowed this to become sort of, you know, to play such a significant role in my life. So, I think yeah, that’s a that’s maybe a regret. I’ve had that I had this talent, because I think I was also really good. And also this kind of passion for my languages and that I sort of never quite pushed myself to figure out how to. Yeah, for them to play a leading role in my life.
Ruth Poundwhite 45:17
I felt like we’ve all got things like that as well. Yeah, who knows, maybe it’ll come up in a way that you can’t even imagine. Yeah,
Tamsin Williamson 45:25
I feel like it’s like, it will be like a retirement project or something. I’ll go and like whisk myself off to France. And it’ll all come flooding back to me, I’m sure. Save it for later.
Ruth Poundwhite 45:36
Thank you so much for sharing. And this has been such a helpful, helpful conversation. And I hope that it inspires people to potentially see something they didn’t see before or take, make a move that they’ve that’s in their heart to do something different.
Tamsin Williamson 45:54
I hope so too. I really do. It’s really worth it.
Ruth Poundwhite 45:55
And if you want to find out more about Tamsin and her work, you can find her on Instagram at the parenthood coach or visit her website, the parenthood coach dot code at UK. Thank you so much for listening to another episode of quietly ambitious, if you have a moment to rate and review know that it really does make a difference. And if you’d like to carry on the conversation, then you can connect with me on Instagram at Ruth Poundwhite Join me in the Facebook group or my personal favourite. Sign up to my newsletter letters to quietly ambitious humans. Just go to Ruth poundwhite.com forward slash newsletter to subscribe and keep doing what you’re doing because your work really does matter.
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“Make sure there is space to turn the spotlight into yourself. To make sure you feature, that you don’t forget yourself, that you don’t abandon your own aspirations, dreams, passions and the things that matter to you”
Today I’m chatting with Tamsin Williamson, aka the Parenthood Coach, about how parenting is a superpower in business, and while being a parent often seems to feel at odds to running a business, they actually work very well together.
Tamsin is a transformational Life and Mindset Coach, trained mindfulness teacher and mum of two spirited kids. Tamsin’s mission is to support ambitious but unfulfilled Mums who feel their passion, purpose and potential have been stifled by the intensity of Motherhood.
In this episode, we talk about how parenthood can inspire and arm us with skills for business, how it can enable our dreams rather than forcing us to abandon them, and the key mindset shifts that make it all work.
Some of the things we talked about:
- How parenthood can inspire and arm us with skills for business, and enable our dreams rather than forcing us to abandon them
- The key mindset shifts & support required to make it all work
- Advice to those thinking about starting a business alongside parenthood (or vice versa!)
- How do we find the balance?!
Links from the episode:
- Tamsin’s Instagram
- Tamsin’s Website
- FREEBIE: The Self Employed Mums Survival Guide
- EMAIL COMMUNITY: The Parenthood Retreat
Other episodes you might like:
- Episode #5: Eloise Rickman on Changing the World, Peaceful Parenting & Business Boundaries
- Episode #107: Are You Building The Business You Really Desire?
“All of these skills and experiences that being a parent arms us with are so very valuable to other people, to ourselves, and how they allow us to show up in the world.”
If you enjoyed the podcast and want to share on social media – thank you! Can you use the hashtag #QuietlyAmbitious so that we can continue the conversation on social media, and so that I can find you? I’d love to see what resonated with you after each episode!
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Thanks so much for listening!
When you subscribe to updates you get access to 3 bonus episodes of the podcast – exclusively for email subscribers – that dive behind the scenes of my business (I talk about failures, money, community & more!)