Episode #91: Unmute Your Voice & Trust Yourself To Market YOUR Way with Neha Awasthi

Ruth Poundwhite 0:06
You’re listening to creatively human with honest conversations about what matters to us and how it really feels to build an online business, put our work out into the world, make an impact in our own unique way, and importantly, to get well paid for it. I’m your host Ruth Poundwhite business mentor to quietly ambitious humans. Hi, and welcome back to another interview on the creatively human podcast. Today, I’m chatting with Neha vasti, master storyteller, organic lead generation expert and Instagram strategist who specialises in helping you to unmute your latent superpowers, so that you become more addictive than shits Creek for your potential clients online. They are also helped private practitioners, consultants, service providers and experts create dependable online lead generation systems without spending on ads or being sleazy, so that they can control their monthly revenue, work less and change more lives. In this episode, we talk about what gets in the way of sensitive humans and women owning and using their true voices. Why this is a superpower when it comes to marketing, and the role that self responsibility and self trust have in all of this. I think this is gonna speak to a lot of you. So enjoy. Let’s talk about muting our superpowers as business owners. What do you mean by that? And what are the ways in which we do that?

Neha Awasti 1:35
So muting our voice is just such a topic, especially among women entrepreneurs. And the biggest way I believe that we mute our voice, is by believing how I would put it that we are a speck in the world when we are the galaxy, because we just undermine our power so much. And we give in to the voices of our brain, you know, the fear and doubt all of those things. But also, something that we don’t realise is the social conditioning and the cultural conditioning. And the messages that we absorb, you know, that are outdated, and they were based on patriarchal structures, they have a lot to do with how we mute our voices as well. So it’s about recognising and acknowledging that there is nothing inherently wrong with us, even if we are wanting to speak up and wanting to share our views and opinions, but we are not able to, or we have fears and doubts, like any other human being. And it’s about training our brain in order to be okay with all of that, and really embracing even those things. Because I think a lot of times we resist, and we try to fix all of those things, and we just create more and more resistance in her path. And that doesn’t serve us really well as well. So that’s what I really mean by you know, unmuting your voices is about standing in your truth, sharing what you believe in, and being honest, and you know, just doing business in your integrity, whatever that looks like for you. As a business.

Ruth Poundwhite 3:10
Yeah, I really like what you said about some of the things that get in our way. recognising that it’s not about fixing that stuff. It’s actually about embracing it. I think that that’s very powerful. And it’s certainly a journey I’ve been on. And I’m sure a lot of listeners will relate to. I’m curious. If you care to share what your journey is, with this, like have Have you been on a journey with struggling with certain expectations, cultural conditioning, ways you thought you should be things you thought you should think we’ve thought you should act, how have you navigated this yourself in your own journey.

Neha Awasti 3:51
Totally, because I grew up in India, where, you know, let’s scrub out that tan was the primary message that I got, like, you know, was steeped in it still is, in so many ways. So I when I look back at my own childhood, I feel like, you know, I grew up with the conditioning that inherently who I am and what my colour of the skin is that is just not changeable. That is inherently wrong. And I should look up to, like, you know, the fair skin, because that is the epitome of beauty. So like, you know, to sum it up, like I feel like that just defines, like the extent of the cultural conditioning that I grew up with. And then of course, like, you know, I grew up in a conservative society, but naturally, I was a very, very rebellious girl, like who wanted to just live and do things on her own terms. And that served me really well but that also brought a lot of trouble that I had to kind of heal through and work through all of those things because everything had an inherent bias. message behind it like, you know, Be a good girl, don’t do certain things, girls do certain things this way your life should look like this way. And I was against everything just naturally. And I can see why now because I think my life has just

culminated to that message of unmuting. And partially why because this is

how I feel passionate about because I had to do all of the work on you know, unlearning as much as learning the new messaging and really coming home to my own self, and realising that who I am in the world has nothing to do with my achievements, Mike colour, who I am, culturally, where I come from the immigration, all of the things are part of my persona, but they don’t make me who I am. And it’s, it’s, it’s one of those things that sound really nice on the outside. But when you deeply do the work and really realise within yourself, it just shines, it just gives you you know, it does, I often say that to people that it just makes you unstoppable, it makes you feel that you can do anything.

Ruth Poundwhite 6:09
Yeah, that is so powerful. And I like I really resonate with what you said about this journey. It wasn’t easy. But at the same time, it’s all culminated in who you are and what you’re doing now. And it makes sense. And I think that’s really powerful. And what it let’s talk about that unstoppable piece, because I think that’s also really, really powerful. What is it about unmuting your voice recognising your superpowers that makes you unstoppable.

Neha Awasti 6:39
Um, I think like, you know, when you realise that who you are in a play, like, you start to recognise the trends in your life, you start to embrace the past, that everything was like, you know, like I said, was leading you to a point. And even though some people might be in it right now, like, you know, and it feels really hard, scary, and feels like the end of the world at that time. And 2020 was a great example of that. But I think those things are always the air, but we just don’t sort of do the work to acknowledge them and really look at all of those things deeply. But when we do and when we untie and unravel those threads in our mind, when we work on this stuff that we have internalised you know, from the society, from our parents, from the conditioning, our upbringing, our present actions, stop being coloured by all of those past failures, lack of worthiness, and we really start to recognise, you know, the desires that we have, we start to build things from a place of abundance, instead of scarcity, we start to own our voice and share the message not to impress anyone, not to please anyone, but just to just to use that as a medium, because we feel that it’s an important thing to do. And, and that’s, and that’s why it is so important, because then you realise that what kind of business model, you know, you want to build, like, regardless of what 100 other people are doing around you, what kind of things you what kind of medium, you know, work for you. And, and it’s a skill, it’s a practice, it takes time, which is why I’m just such a big fan of going slow in business, because people often think that going slow means like, actually going slow, like, but you know, my husband shared this quote with me, which really sums it up nicely, let’s slow is smooth and smooth is fast. Because this stuff like to unlearn all of this stuff takes time. It takes effort, it takes energy. And if you’re not dedicating that energy to this type of work, you’re really operating from the old biases and prejudices and the conditioning that you have been given, which means that you’re just repeating the same thing, or you’re hustling your way in business and not really enjoying the journey, as it is said,

Ruth Poundwhite 9:09
Yeah, I can so relate to that. I’ve certainly been in. I mean, all of us want our businesses to grow quickly, right? Because that’s kind of our ego, just we want it to pay off. But I’ve certainly had things happen in my business. They’ve happened slowly, more slowly than I wanted, and I realised it was all part of the journey. I’ve got apologise as people drilling next door, but I’ve just got to carry on anyway. Yeah, it’s all part of the journey. And it taught you a lesson that you needed to figure out what you actually really wanted. Because what you said about unlearning, relearning, go like peeling off peeling back the layers or the kind of identities that we hold on to cultural conditioning. That really speaks to me as well because it’s all about figuring out the diff between what you want and what you’ve been led to believe you should want, and what you should do. And when you can do that, and like you said, it is a slow process. But when you can do that, it’s powerful, because the decisions you make are the right ones for you. Exactly.

Neha Awasti 10:21
Yeah, you’re not solving the wrong problems that because a lot of women entrepreneurs spend so much time in solving the wrong problems and giving into the insecurity that are all the result of all of these things. They don’t trust their own decision making. And they keep, like, you know, oscillating between like one option to another and looking for answers outside of them, especially introverts and sensitive people. I mean, I’m saying introvert as a general term, but like in especially people who are heart centred, and I am one of them. And I had to really realise that I cannot listen to everybody. And so who would I listen to? Like, you know, how would I even know that I’m making the right decision, and I had to learn the skill that the only person who knows what the real decision is and what the right decision is ultimately, me. And a classic example that I go back to from my own personal life is, you know, when I met my husband, it was such a moment of surrender pity for me. And everything that has happened big and beautiful in my life has been like that. And I really started to reflect on that, like, why is that? How could I meet someone in a bar in a random bar, a stranger. And three days later, I can propose him and say that I want to marry you. And a year later, like we are in a new country, we packed our bags, two suitcases and a brown bag, we just moved to a new country. And when I deeply reflected about those decisions was that because I was trusting myself so much in those moments that, you know, I remember all the thoughts that I had, in that time that even if it’s a wrong decision, I will make it right, even if I think that this is not going to work out. So what there will be many more options available to me. It was me trusting in myself, but also in the future. And this is the skill, I realised that I wasn’t deploying in my business. And when I did that, I realised that my cause of misery and suffering was all because of that.

Ruth Poundwhite 12:30
What a powerful story. I love what you said about like, even if this decision right now doesn’t work out the way I’m imagining it, does, I trust myself in the future, like that is so powerful.

Neha Awasti 12:42
Yeah, yeah. Because every decision in the business like may not be the right decision. Like, you know, even if you hire the best coach, and the best plan, like it may not work out the same way that it did for someone else. And then who are you to blame, because then we look for in opportunities to blame or, you know, again, pass out, like the, put the responsibility on someone else. And I think it’s all about taking that 100% responsibility on yourself. Because that is the only thing that you have in control, you cannot control how your clients react, you cannot control how Instagram does things, you cannot control how many likes and comments you get, you cannot control any of the ad campaigns you run or whatever it is, right, like you know, so, like, what will give you groundedness is you and only you and you can only develop that, when you believe that every decision is the right decision. Either you’re going to learn something, or or it’s going to be you know, it’s going to work out really wonderfully. So each one of those things can happen. And when you put that trust in yourself of today, and tomorrow, who you are going to be and trust yourself that you will be okay. Like, you know, we moved to a new country and then we move to a new city. And the same thing I reminded myself that, oh, if we can move countries, we can move cities like it’s no big deal. I mean, things didn’t work out at that time, in a way that we were hoping for. So what like you know, we learn big lessons in life. And we packed our bags again and we move back to the you know, the city that we came originally to in the first place. And that’s that’s the power and that’s the belief that gives you the confidence and you know, I see this pattern so much that we keep looking for confidence outside of us that only if I could get this bit right only if I could get this strategy only if I could have you know that coach or whatever your story might be, and none of that is ever going to give you the confidence if you are not putting the trust in who you are today. And the place you’re making those decisions from and trust in your future self that she will be okay she will be wise and smart enough because of the decisions that you’re making today, and she will take care of you.

Ruth Poundwhite 15:06
Yes, absolutely. And I think what you’re speaking to here is really important because, like you mentioned, being completely responsible for yourself, but doing so from a place of trusting in yourself, which is very different from taking on responsibility for all of the things that may not work out. I think there’s an important distinction there. Yes. I personally believe massively in in self responsibility and self trust. But it doesn’t come at the price of beating myself up about everything. It doesn’t come at the price of blaming myself for everything. Obviously, you feel feelings, you feel angry at yourself, sometimes you feel disappointed sometimes in business in life, because you’re human. But the important thing is, if when you trust yourself, and you trust the journey, it’s like, Okay, well, I learned something from that. I stretched myself, I found out what it was capable of. I learned how not to do it. I like what I don’t want. And you kind of carry on. And I think that’s that’s a really important thing. Because I know that a lot of like sensitive business owners listening, a lot of us do blame ourselves for things and it’s not it. That’s not what we mean by self responsibility.

Neha Awasti 16:19
No, not at all. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. I think the first self responsibility that we need to learn and to take its responsibility to be kind and compassionate, and all encompassing for ourselves. Like, we need to be our own best friends. First of all, like that would be my number one, taking, like, you know, that would be number one step or the lesson, if I ever create like a programme on taking personal responsibility, that would be the number one skill, because it’s not about, you know, taking responsibility for whatever is happening and self berate and criticise yourself. Whereas it’s like you said, it’s about recognising Yep. You know, sometimes things feel disappointing, and they make you feel like frustrating and frustrated. And, you know, all of those emotions are part of it. But it’s about taking the responsibility that even those emotions are part of all the human experience. And life was never meant to be all happy, joyful, and successful. In fact, business was never meant to be, you know, I was listening to this example, the other day, like, you know, this business is all about, like doing uncomfortable things. But uncomfortable doesn’t necessarily have to mean bad, or it doesn’t have to mean like something has gone wrong. Like that’s how it was supposed to be like you stretch your muscle, it is uncomfortable to lift weights and stretch your muscles, but then you give it a rest. And you know, this is this is the important part for especially sensitive people, that we oftentimes we have this perfectionist fantasy in our mind that we can just go go, go, go go. And we can always, we should always feel comfortable doing the things that are uncomfortable. And when we put ourselves out there when we, you know, put our work out there for judgement of other people, it is uncomfortable, it will always be uncomfortable, but it’s about leaning into that feeling and then allowing yourself some rest time afterwards, which is what we don’t do, because we think that we have this expectation that we should be able to put all the Instagram posts and all the opinions with full comfort and full confidence all the time. And confidence is just a result that you get after doing those uncomfortable things in in a series like repeatedly when you do those uncomfortable things. That’s how you learn to develop confidence in the first place. So, you know, the point that I’m trying to make is like we have got it really backwards in our mind sometimes that doesn’t really serve especially those heart centred conscientious sensitive people, you know, for those people.

Ruth Poundwhite 19:14
Absolutely. And I’m a big fan of talking about that discomfort because it’s one thing because what we’ve started off by talking about was, you know, finding our voice figuring out what our real desires are, aside from the people pleasing and the conditioning. And that’s one thing making decisions based on what’s true to us. But there’s a real discernment needed between Okay, what’s actually wrong for me versus what just feels a bit uncomfortable because I’m not used to that yet and I need to stretch. And I like what you said, Yeah, confidence comes when you stretch and it’s so true. And I’ve definitely found that for example, with this podcast. I was so scared to do it. And now it’s one of my favourite things to do. It was very uncomfortable when I started it. But it didn’t mean it was wrong for me. And in fact, the main reason I thought it was wrong for me, the main reason it was so uncomfortable was because of all those stories, because of all those ideas I had about what I should be, or who a podcast host should be, or whatever. So yeah, that’s really, really important. Okay, I’m just gonna, yeah, let’s, let’s talk about how all of this and kind of unmuting our voices owning our superpowers, how does this tie into marketing our business?

Neha Awasti 20:36
So, you know, in today’s world where we have competition in everything in all the service based businesses product and whatever, I think the biggest differentiating point is that your voice, your visual voice, and your verbal voice, that’s how I believe it. Like the best way to stand out and really connect with your kind of people is when you come to that authentic self, and, you know, really recognise that which What are your powers? And what how do you express that voice in the best way, and not listening to, you know, like, a lot of advice that has been given that, okay, like, do things this way, I mean, you know, they give, it’s a well meaning advice, but it’s, it’s also should be taken with the context that that advice is coming from one person’s experience. And you can take it, you can experiment with it, and see if it works for you. But it doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to, like, take that, and you know, do the same thing for rest of your life. It’s like, you know, a thing, a dress looks so amazing on a mannequin when you see it in the shop, but when you put it on, it doesn’t fit really well, it makes you uncomfortable, you’re like, this is not my style. So then those are the moments that we should look for, what is your style? Like? What is your voice? What are your opinions? What are the things that you’re passionate about? What is something that you would say, in a roomful of your most loving people that you, you know, truly connect with, and if they are collected there, to schober love and they adore you, if you put that trust in your audience, what is something that you would say to them, like, for example, one of the things that I was given advice on that or like, you know, you write these poems, and you put them on social media, like, you know, they don’t really suit your brand, and they don’t really fit anywhere in marketing. But that’s, that’s part of my self expression. And that’s how I express. And they have really served me really, really well because most of my audience, I realised that you know what, my pick, my people appreciate that creative flair, my people don’t want to listen to the same marketing spiel in like, three liner, whatever, you know, my people really connect with the messages in the way that I deliver that and you know, first it starts with that trust, and then I trust that my people will also understand it. And if they don’t, and if they hate it, and if they’re confused, or whatever, then maybe they’re not my people. And that’s the thing that we have to remember that people are more than what you can fit in an avatar worksheet, like, you know, you have to really dig deep and really connect with their hearts and minds. And when you empathise in a deeper way, you trust that they are there to adore you they are they’re looking for the solutions that you offer. You know, from that trust, you find what is the best way that you can, you can express your voice and what in what in what way that you will express yourself overall, like, in a way you dress in a way you say, in a way you you know, all the visual marketing that you do, and and also inverts, as I said,

Ruth Poundwhite 23:57
Yeah, exactly. And one way might not be what certain type of people want and that’s okay, because they’re not your right people. Tell Sterling right. Okay, so I believe you have one of your poems to share with us. If that’s Yeah,

Neha Awasti 24:10
sure. I’ll read one of these. So I don’t have a title for this one. So we’ll maybe one of the audience members can come up with a title for this. That would be a good thing. They said she will braved the storms, but there was none insight. They said she will rise up to greatness, but there was no chance to fight. One day. Then she woke up. She dusted off the hazy clouds. She saw a mirror very clearly, and looked into the eyes of her own self who she had lost somewhere. What she called the turmoil and ran away from was actually the purpose of her life. She rose up victorious and realised this was the war that she was born to fight.

Ruth Poundwhite 25:01
Beautiful. Thank you. And I can see how you sharing that as your marketing. It’s not just marketing as it’s more than marketing. But I can see how that. I mean, it’s obviously taken you to unmute your voice in order to write poetry like that. And it can, it’s just, yeah, it’s true to you. And it’s what will connect you with the right people speaking that truth in your right, yeah,

Neha Awasti 25:28
because it’s a message that’s wrapped up, it’s just expressed differently. It’s expressed in a way how my brain works. I mean, you know, it’s not just what I write, like, I’m big on storytelling as well. But, you know, this is the question I had to ask myself, because I have a really creative flair. And then I have a really strategic part of my brain as well. And I wouldn’t feel fulfilled if I just worked on strategy and plans, and I took that creative flair out of it. And I, I had to give myself permission that Yep, you know, not many marketers write poems, but I’m going to do that. And, you know, see what decision how that decision unfolds. And so far, it has served me really well, I still keep going, I still enjoy doing it, maybe there will come a time when I wouldn’t. And that would be fine, too. So you know, not literally, like lingering on to one thing and one hat all the time, either. And like you said, like, it’s a part of me, it’s a part of message that is important to me, to, you know, the healing journey that I have been on and sharing that and giving permission to women, because I truly believe in my own business, combining soul with strategy, you need to have a plan to go from one place to another. But you also need to have, you know, a mindset and a soul to really being able to enjoy that journey. Because otherwise, what’s the point?

Ruth Poundwhite 26:57
Yeah, absolutely. I think it’s so key to highlight that it’s about your personal fulfilment, and what you find personally creative, or how you make your marketing creative. And I find the same thing, it’s really important to remember like, it’s not just your marketing doesn’t just need to be a means to an end, it can be something that you enjoy in and of itself.

Neha Awasti 27:19
Yeah, I think that’s the prerequisite. In fact, like, I would say, that is the prerequisite, like, if you’re not enjoying it, because what happens is when women like, you know, women entrepreneurs, like I think they take on, say, Instagram as a thing to do, like, it’s a must thing to do. And they don’t really find their soul and a place where they’re actually enjoying doing that. They wouldn’t be able to do that consistently, like, how long can you drag that bag on the hump, and like, you know, keep carrying on like, you know, it’s a, it’s an uncomfortable journey in itself, and then you load more pressure and more shoulds and more of, you know, those ideas, so it’s just not going to be sustainable at all. So, in a way, I think it’s a prerequisite for marketing to be yourself expression. And marketing is really just like, you know, from the place that I see, it’s just really self expression combined with helping others, sharing something that can help your people today, and which you enjoy creating is marketing. Now you have to give yourself permission to do in a way that feels true, that feels creative, that really fuels you to be able to like, you know, do it over and over again,

Ruth Poundwhite 28:40
I just wrote, I was just like scribbling that down as you were talking marketing, is self expression combined with helping others. I love that. And I know that a lot of people listening will have an idea of what marketing should be. And again, it comes back to what we were talking about right at the beginning markets, we’ve got an idea that marketing should be a certain way, you have to be allowed person, that you have to be extra confident that you have to be in people’s faces all the time you have to push. It’s just marketing, isn’t that in itself, that’s a way of marketing. It’s one expression of marketing. And for some people, that is their true expression of marketing. And for others, that’s them, pretending to be someone they’re not.

Neha Awasti 29:24
Exactly. And you know, that’s what it is. You have so much mental drama, going around marketing, social media, and selling, like the three big things in our businesses. And it takes time to unlearn those things. And it’s more about that, like you know, before you take on someone’s approach, I would say, to work on unlearning those things and those patterns and beliefs that you have an idea around that what marketing should be and because we see most of that I feel it’s even more important that women unmute their voices and give us many more example many Much more variety of what marketing can look like. Like I want to see women of all diverse creativity, skin colours and backgrounds and cultural Heritage’s to be, you know, incorporating all of that in their marketing. Like, it’s a big part of at least who I am, like, you know, I cannot leave where I have spent major part of my life in, but I’m also living in Australia now. So, you know, India is just is my native home, and Australia is my home right now. So, I, me as a person cannot leave one for the other. So it becomes a natural part of who I am, and how it comes across. Like most of my examples will be career related. Most of my visuals, like a lot of my visuals will have lot of ethnic jewellery, because that’s, those are all the things that make me who I am. So I never tried to hide, or like, you know, separate all of those parts from my business, because I believe that business is personal, my business has to like amalgamate with who I am and all my life, and I don’t want to be living like five different faces, you know, that will just take the joy out of it. And I recommend to all the listeners that you don’t do that, either. Because if something is not your natural personality, you don’t have to turn into someone you’re not. You know, we’re all born warriors. And we also have like such a big heart, we have to really embrace that within ourselves and give ourselves permission that we are birthing something unique here. And, you know, it’s like, when we give birth to a child, we look for the most unique name and you know, we put so much love and intention. And somehow when we birth our businesses, we go and look and ask for Can you name my child? Can you can you propose something? Like, what should my child where, you know, we give all of the decision making power to all the other people, right? So yeah, it is so much about being true to who you are. And that takes time. But I always recommend putting that time is the fast way to go. So put that time, because you will be making better decisions, you will be more grounded in your decisions. And you will be working in serving the people that you’re meant to be serving, you will think you will have more mental capacity to solve the problems that you know, are new and big. And that’s how we evolve in our business and we create results for ourselves and for our clients.

Ruth Poundwhite 32:40
Yeah, absolutely. And it just, I, there’s something that I do to help me with this kind of stuff. So like you said, I wholeheartedly agree that we need more examples of different ways of doing things and different types of people and different opinions, different voices, we need to see examples of it all. But it can be hard, right? If what you’re doing feels different, especially if you’re a sensitive human. But what I always think of I always think of like performers. And so people like Lady Gaga, right? She’s really out there. And she certainly has been in the past some of her outfits and everything. I use that as an inspiration because I think it’s all well and good looking at people like her and other performers like David Bowie people like that, you know, who really like change things, push the boundaries. It’s worked, we can see with hindsight, you know, it worked. People love them, people adore them, they did really well. But imagine them when they were before they were famous, you know, or like David Bowie always been different. And I just I like to think about that. Because if you’re going to, if you’re going to push boundaries, if you’re going to create your own way of doing things, then it’s bound to feel uncomfortable. It’s bound to feel scary to be different to other people. But I certainly I take a lot of inspiration from people like outside of business, certainly business owners as well. But yeah, I think it’s so helpful to just think of those people, it brings me a lot of comfort, basically.

Neha Awasti 34:18
Yeah, and you know, that’s a great strategy. And you know, you are doing such important work. Like even through your podcasts, I can just see such a reflection of your belief through like, you know, that you believe in diversity and not just believe and you’re not doing the lip service, you’re actually bringing on people whose voices are important and diversity in that. So I really want to commend you for that, like, you know, because we need people to be doing that kind of work in the world. And that’s how other people get permission and confidence like, you know, you are Lady Gaga to someone else right now. Something else I say you know, to ease up that discomfort of standing out is again, you know, recognising that in that moment, you are giving power to someone else’s opinion more than your own opinion. And it’s a muscle. It’s a muscle that has been trained by society by parents by patriarchy by all the biases that others other people’s opinion matter more than what you think, which colour or like Mommy, which colour dress should I wear today? Is it blue or yellow? Mommy says yellow. And you know, even in those little moments, we are learning that, oh, it’s up to other people to make that choice for us. You know, so like an honour biter basis, like, you know, society, and just inherently the structures that have been created have been created to serve a set number of people, and definitely not women. So which is why all the records, which is why you need to unmute your voice, because that’s why you need to step up and really, you know, own that part of yourself. Because we need to catch up, we need to, you know, make room for more and more examples to emerge.

Ruth Poundwhite 36:15
Absolutely. And my little boy is three, and we have a book about David Bowie. And I just think, you know, that’s, that’s the incredible ripple effect that it can have, right, someone being true to themselves and using their voice. And a little three year old boy is saying that, and who knows how that will manifest in him. He loves David Bowie’s music as well. It’s just amazing. But yeah, no, you’re so right. Before we reach the end, there’s something I really want to ask you. Because, obviously, we could have talked about so much stuff. But we’ve gotten really deep into this stuff. And I love it, I love it. But one of the things you said when we were discussing what to talk about, before we recorded was that you don’t have to be loud on the internet, but you do have to be smart. And I’m really curious to hear your thoughts on that.

Neha Awasti 37:05
I think what I mean by you don’t have to be loud, and you have to be smart, that kind of go hand in hand, because a lot of people imitate the loudness. And that’s not being smart. Because a laser beam works very differently to a shotgun approach. Because when you’re being loud, you think you have to be everywhere, you have to be seen by all the people, you have to be the loudest person in the room. And if it is, you, that’s totally fine. If it is your natural personality, you enjoy that. Go for it, because I can I can be one of those people sometimes. But at other times I’m not. And I’m, I’m even ready to embrace that and be witness in me, like, you know, I need a lot of time on my own. And I need a lot of people around me as well. And what I mean by that is when you focus on yourself, when you first of all, do the work on yourself as to what your preferences are, what your beliefs are. What would you do if you trusted that everyone who is on Instagram who is in your community adores you, they’re waiting to hear you speak like period, what would you say to those people and getting really clear on your own choices, first of all, before starting to like, you know, take on like different strategies and like trying to imitate and feeling the pressure, that you have to do things in a way that they are doing. You know, every everyone success formula is different, yours will be different too. And we get into this mistaken belief when we try to imitate that, only if we imitated what they are doing, we will get the same results. And for me, that is not being smart, because it is never going to happen like that. If you imitate it, like everything that they have done in their business, you are still a person on your own, either you will be very miserable because you will be going against your own soul and the grain and who you are. Or you will not have the same result. Because it’s not just the action that produces the result is the intention and the energy that you put behind the result behind the action that creates that result. And for me taking that time to decide what your true intention is behind those actions, and how would you express those and working through your fears and discomforts. Which is why I’m such a big believer in coaching. The process of coaching helps you to do that helps you to expediate that journey so much because it’s a space where you can come and you know that you can unravel your fears and discomfort and work through those things and coming home to yourself and that is is that is the smart way of going about it

Ruth Poundwhite 40:03
thank you i think that really sums up our conversation in a really nice and useful way so just really quickly what would be your top tips for people who want to go deeper into this work of unlearning relearning unmuting their voice what kind of tools advice would you have for them get

Neha Awasti 40:23
a good coach period i think a good coaching container can really help you unravel all of those mindset and really help you create the strategy that works for you i mean you know of course i learned from all the people and their strategy how they have done but at the end of the day develop that confidence to develop that confidence that you can assess that what will work what will not work and really recognise it from the place what you said like you know that discernment whether it is you not leaning into the discomfort that you’re masking it as oh this is not me because i think that happens a lot as well people would just like you know discount the strategies or things and actions base and would just say that oh this is not me whereas it’s just their fear talking in that moment so that’s a really important point as well but you know i really wholeheartedly believe in the process of good coaching and really transforming and doing that deep inner healing work yeah that would be my number one place where i would start because that lets you respect yourself enough and really come home to yourself and then you stop sort of fetishizing other experts you respect them enough to take their opinion but you don’t have a fetish for like you know you don’t put them on a pedestal like doesn’t matter what their business is and how big their businesses and then you can allow yourself to come out of their shadows and really shine your own light because that’s what a true coaching process does it really helps you to find your own light and really shining in a way that you know that works for you

Unknown Speaker 42:10
yeah

Ruth Poundwhite 42:10
yeah i always think that either really being what’s the word really disliking someone massively or putting people on pedestals i think that both of them are signs that you need to dig into something within yourself i saw truths that you brought that okay yeah and i totally agree i’ve had i mean i’m a massive believer in the power of coaching and i do think that i do believe it can change the world for the better

Neha Awasti 42:37
basically yes i think so too like you know we think we need you know when people are saying oh like you know everyone is a coach and i’m saying that oh my gosh where was coaching before like that’s what i wanted like you know five years ago in my life i didn’t know what coaching was at all at that time so it’s amazing that we have more and more and different kinds of coaches

Ruth Poundwhite 43:00
absolutely and there’s all different types of coaches there’s all different techniques modalities that coaches use and it’s finding the right one for you so yeah okay so i’m just gonna ask you a random question from my deck of cards before it’s a juicy one so what do you regret not doing when you were younger

Neha Awasti 43:21
huh okay that’s uh you know what i like regret like they have been a lot of regrets and again i’m you know i don’t want to discount the question there have been a lot of regrets but i have done a lot of work in now seeing them as that they were all leading me to a point where i wanted to come to so i don’t really think of them as regrets but if i were to say one thing it would be not doing not not playing as much because when i was growing up in india like in an indian society you basically are just so you know everyone is so academically focused that you go from like school to one tuition to physics and chemistry and handwriting and maths

until you go to your bed

that would be one thing like you know i wish that i had spent more time in more creative pursuits and what like finding out what are what were those things that i actually wanted to learn and do

Ruth Poundwhite 44:29
yeah that would be one thing and i guess you’ve got you’ve got your business to play and now you’ve got your life and business to play now so

Neha Awasti 44:37
yes that’s exactly how it started which is why i feel like you know oh my gosh like this is my time i’m not going to let anyone dictate what i do it is my playground i’m going to do everything in this if it goes wrong fine if it doesn’t also good yes

Ruth Poundwhite 44:56
yeah i love that well thank you so much this has been a beautiful conversation and i think a lot of people are going to resonate with this a lot so thank you

Neha Awasti 45:05
oh thank you for having me ruth it has been such a pleasure and i have been longing to meet you like you know in virtually so thank you so much for having me

Ruth Poundwhite 45:14
it’s one of the best things about having a podcast having these juicy conversations with people if you enjoyed this episode and you want to learn more about nihar you can find her on instagram that’s at underscore ne heart of our state which is spelled n e h a AWASTHI she also has a facebook group called unmuted for business women who want to be trailblazers and to be heard thank you so much for listening to another episode of creatively human if you have a moment i’d be so grateful if you could rate and review the podcast it really does make a difference and if you’d like to carry on the conversation or ask a question for a future q&a episode there are three ways to connect with me on the facebook group on instagram at Ruth Poundwhite or my personal favourite my behind the scenes newsletter just go to Ruth poundwhite.com forward slash newsletter to subscribe and keep doing what you’re doing because your work really does matter

Transcribed by https://otter.ai